Author |
Message |
Deborah P Kolodji
New member Username: dkolodji
Post Number: 16 Registered: 04-2005
| Posted on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 - 10:40 am: |
|
At the End of the Road Glimpses of the cabin surrounded by forest, with its woebegone roof sagging from years. Neglect, a tired garment spruced up with wildflowers -- the call of a bird echoes in stillness. Flutter of butterflies, three new cans of paint -- smiles on a face which hasn't smiled lately. - Deborah P Kolodji |
Dale McLain
Advanced Member Username: sparklingseas
Post Number: 878 Registered: 11-2004
| Posted on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 - 11:30 am: |
|
I love this Deborah. Sweet and hopeful. take care~dale |
M
Board Administrator Username: mjm
Post Number: 3177 Registered: 11-1998
| Posted on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 - 4:07 pm: |
|
What a sweet end of the road you have portrayed, Deborah. Also loved the beginning and ending words of each verse -- glimpses, from years, neglect, stillness, flutter, lately. Almost a poem in themselves. Nice work! |
Denis M. Garrison
Advanced Member Username: denismgarrison
Post Number: 266 Registered: 01-2005
| Posted on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 - 4:09 pm: |
|
Debbie, Fine sequence with strong imagery. Very nice indeed! A ? - S3 L4 - hadn't? bw, Denis www.dmgar.com My books are available at www.lulu.com/denismgarrison
|
Kathy Paupore
Advanced Member Username: kathy
Post Number: 2083 Registered: 12-2003
| Posted on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 - 5:47 pm: |
|
Deborah, enjoyed. Nicely done. You make it look deceptively easy to do a cinq. sequence. K |
Michael MV
Senior Member Username: michaelv
Post Number: 918 Registered: 11-2003
| Posted on Wednesday, June 29, 2005 - 6:01 pm: |
|
A poem of 3 cinquain stanzas. The 1st stanza is not as uniquely strong as are the 2nd & 3rd; these 2 I esp liked for the freshness. Make the entire poem "three new cans of paint." Best Regards MV
|
LJ Cohen
Moderator Username: ljc
Post Number: 2400 Registered: 07-2002
| Posted on Thursday, June 30, 2005 - 7:33 am: |
|
Deborah, The second, my favorite, though all together, ahhh. Lovely work. ljc |
Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb
Post Number: 4144 Registered: 07-2001
| Posted on Thursday, June 30, 2005 - 9:33 am: |
|
Debbie, I like the set a lot, but now that see the word without consideration it is WOTD, I wonder if it were replaced by something that says the roof was once well-crafted... Thanks. Gary Drop in read the new MindFire, 2005's first Go in through http://www.mindfirerenew.com/ to get to the issue in a click or two.
|
E V Brooks
Advanced Member Username: lia
Post Number: 1171 Registered: 12-2003
| Posted on Saturday, July 02, 2005 - 6:07 am: |
|
Very nicely done Deborah. Love the second, but for me they are all well done and work well together as a whole piece. lia |